I spoke with a youth pastor this week. I guy I had not spoken to in a while. I was saddened to hear that he is now a former youth pastor. Not that it is bad to be a former anything, just that he is former because of some bad things, much of which appears to have been out of his control.

However, God spoke to us in our conversation. After hearing much of his story I asked him the simple question, "What is God saying to you through all of this?" His reply was short, sweet and foundational. "Humility" is what he said.

Humility is the mother of all virtue. It is the foundation to the spiritual life. In other words, it is the engine of life change into the image of the Triune God. Here is a brief explanation from Anthony Bloom's "Living Prayer":
"Basically humility is the attitude of one who stands constantly under the judgement of God. It is the attitude of one who is like the soil. Humility comes from the Latin work humus, fertile ground. The fertile ground is there, unnoticed, taken for granted, always there to be trodden upon. It is silent, inconspicuous, dark and yet it is always ready to receive any seed, ready to give it substance and life. The more lowly, the more fruitful, because it becomes really fertile when it accepts all the refuse of the earth. It is so low that nothing can soil it, abase it, humiliate it: it has accepted the last place and cannot go any lower. In that position nothing can shatter the soul's serenity, it's peace and joy."

Labels: Formation

You know those mornings when you go about doing your normal devotional time and you read something and it basically knocks you out? Something so profound hits you and it bleeds through the rest of your day and even into the rest of the week? I guess it is like have a full throttle energy drink when the buzz hits and it carries you through a while...

Well, such was my morning. Instead of telling you what hit me in the reading I will simply post the reading here for you. Maybe God will use it for you like He is/has for me.

This is from Eastern Orthodox Metropolitan Kallistos Ware:
"As soon as we make a serious attempt to pray in spirit and in truth, at once we become acutely conscious of our interior disintegration, of our lack of unity and wholeness. In spite of all our efforts to stand before God, thoughts continue to move restlessly and aimlessly through our head, like the buzzing of flies....
To contemplate means, first of all, to be present where one is - to be here and now. But usually we find ourselves unable to restrain our mind from wandering at random over time and space. We recall the past, we anticipate the future, we plan what to do next; people and places come before us in unending succession. We lack power to gather ourselves into the one place where we should be - here, in the presence of God; we are unable to fully live in the only moment that truly exists - now, the immediate present.
This interior disintegration is one of the most tragic consequences of the Fall. The people who get things done, it has been justly observed, are the people who do one thing at a time. But to do one thing at a time is no mean achievement. While difficult enough in external work, it is harder still in the work of inner prayer."
(From the Power of the Name, by Kallistos Ware)

Labels: Formation, Monastic, Prayer

This is a phrase I have stolen from Gahndi.

My prayer is that EVERY youth minister in AMiA owns this phrase. We become what we are calling our students to be...

Let me burst the bubble here really quickly...We all struggle with the tendency to call our teens to things that we ourselves, if we are honest, are not modeling. We must close this gap with God's help. Whether they tell you or not, teens see right through it. Authenticity, which is the arm to reach teens in the Lord, demands it. You must practice what you preach. You must not walk to preach if your preaching is not in the walking. You must....be the change.

Be the Change->translation->be formed into the image of the Trinity...character formation...Christ likeness...

This relates in many, many ways to teens and youth ministry. Here are a few...

1) Your youth ministry is usually a reflection of your overall church ethos.
2) Are you at home in your youth ministry? Teens connect to a youth group because they feel at home more than if they like the games etc...
3) There is not a teen problem, there is a human problem. Be transformed. You can only take teens as deep as God is taking you.

Labels: Formation, Training

Our friends at Youth Specialties have recently had their Jr High Youth Pastors Summit. They had Professor Christian Smith come and speak at it (he is the sociology Professor at Notre Dame and the director of the national study of youth and religion. Chris is widely regarded as one of the leading sociologists in the US, particularly in the area chris co-authored, with Melinda Lundquist Denton, the important, research-based book Soul Searching: The Religious and Spiritual Lives of American Teenagers. ). Here are some notes from Marko's Blog (www.ysmarko.com) that are profound:

Christian –
• Started studying teens in 2000, Have kept up with the teens and send cards because they want to be able to conduct more surveys as the same teens age. Last week finished up a third wave survey. Have a retention rate of 78%. In the Fall he is writing a book on the third wave. Not much has changed in the two years between wave one and two, they all were still on the same trajectory. Only two had lives who were significantly different, and they had both had children. They went from way out there to focusing on pulling their life together. Those who have fallen out seem to be those who live transient at risk lives.

• The Role of Parents in Youth Ministry – He went into his work believing that parents must survive their children’s teenage years. He came out of the project realizing how profoundly formed teenagers are by their parents, and other adult figures in their lives. Culture is set up to de-authorize parents from having to deal with their teenage kids. for instance, there are therapists, youth workers, coaches and other specialists who there to fix kids. Parents get the feeling that they are not capable of parenting their own kids, that they aren’t good enough or qualified enough. Many Parents are ok with this. Many Youth Ministers seem to have troubled relationships with the parents of their students. So many institutions are set up to separate teenagers from adult interaction, which is why parents are so crucial, they are the only consistent adult contact that teens have. Teenagers really benefit from just normal relationships with adults. Socialization, students are formed by the things that are around them, and because teens don’t have much control over their surroundings and are therefore shaped by them. Even though teens act as if they don’t hear what their parents are trying to say to them, they are soaking every word up. Teenagers are replicating their parents.

• How do we reach kids without parents who have faith? - The Church has a full time youth ministry, and the kid has friends (majority of friends) who draw them into that youth group. Other adults did not play into these teens faith. This simply stresses the importance of parents and their faith. These are not independent - you need both!

• The most important pastor a teenager will ever have is their parents.

• What really matters with teens are socially relevant relationships ( a sense of belonging)

• Parents need to be part of responsible communities with other adults who challenge them in parenting. Other adults also have a responsibility to try to affect teens and play a role in there lives.

• Styles of Parenting
• Good Parenting has 2 or 3 dimensions. 1st: strong and clear expectations with boundaries, demands and accountablility. (Parents are proactive in educating their children of the paremeters) 2nd: Emotional Warmth and closeness (letting children know they are loved) Both of these must be used together in order to have a well rounded relationship with the kids. The 3rd dimension is Cognitive autonomy, the idea of having space to work things out and room for children to come to a position that is not exactly the same as the parent.

Labels: Formation, Parenting

I think witnessing should be considered a spiritual discipline. This is something that has been bouncing around in my head lately and I think it should at least be considered. We think of prayer, fasting, study, works of service and corporate worship as spiritual disciplines because they help put you in a position of grace. Well, witnessing seems to do this for me.

When I first became a Christian I was all about evangelism. You could not shut me up. I wanted EVERYONE to know about this God who had revealed Himself to me and changed everything. This God who was everything I had been looking for.

Soon after, I was all about discipleship. This was a result of many things. Primarily:
1) I got a vision for Christian maturity. I read St Francis of Assisi and Mother Teresa etc...
2) I saw a disconnect between the NT presentation of Christian maturity and what was being lived out by Christians, especially the leaders and the "mature Christians" in my little experience.

Evangelism fell off the radar for me. Soon I completely lost my passion for it. I knew this...but I did not know what to do about it.

Things have been slowly changing for me on this front the last few years. Culminating, most recently, in Jamaica where I sent our group out to do street ministry a few times. I really got into this and it has really helped ignite my passion for evangelism. So...is witnessing a spiritual discipline?

Labels: Formation

Permission to slow down, simplify and seek. Permission to create space to cry out to God.

A prophetic AW Tozer wrote the following:
The simplicity which is in Christ is rarely found among us. In its stead are programs, methods, organizations and a world of nervous activities which occupy time and attention but can never satisfy the longing of the heart. The shallowness of our inner experience, the hollowness of our worship and that servile imitation of the world which marks our promotional methods all testify that we, in this day, know God only imperfectly, and the peace of God scarcely at all.

Sounds all too familiar:) Often times youth workers can feel like they have to push. They have to do more stuff. They have to press through incredible levels of anxiety and run a new program or implement a new idea and method in order to do the job.

And sometimes all we need is permission.

Permission to stop the craziness that is, if we are honest, killing us. We are separated from rest, from peace, from our families, friends and...worst of all...we are separated from our true selves. Have permission to slow down. To seek Him. To experience the transforming presence of the Lord.

Labels: Formation

Some stats I got from a friend (who in turn got them from Mark Driscoll) on ministers:

(please be seated...shocking stuff)
1) 1500 pastors leave the ministry each month.

Did you read that? Yipes. That is 18000 a year due to moral failure, spiritual burnout or contention in their churches.

2) 50% of pastors marriages will end in divorce.

3) 80% of pastors and 84% of their spouses fell unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors.

4) 50% of pastors are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way of making a living.

Ouch.

5) 80% of seminary and Bible school graduates who enter the ministry will leave the ministry within the first 5 years.

6) 70% of pastors constantly fight depression.

If any of these are you...or might be you if you continue on the way you are going. STOP!

Please stop! It is not God's desire for you to end up as one of these statistics.

Here are a few suggestions:

Listen to my podcast on "growing your soul while working with students"
Read "Celebration of Discipline" by Richard Foster...

Read my next blog on more ideas to help stop this.

Labels: Formation

First off, let me state clearly that I thoroughly enjoyed the DVD. I would highly recommend that you watch it if you have not already. It is longer than any of his Nooma stuff as it is over an hour long.

I have taken some time to reflect on it since I watched it. Here are a few thoughts...

1) He pays reference to String Theorists...I wish he would not have. I don't put much stock in a theory that has no substantiation. For those in the scientific know this might turn them off.
2) I REALLY liked his main premise...which is this...In Jesus' tradition there is no such thing as a spiritual life. EVERYTHING is spiritual. The rest of his talk bears this out.
3) Because everything is spiritual all of life matters. Everything you do. No longer is compartmentalization seen. Your time on the job is not separate from your time with your friends is not separate from your devotional time etc... everything is connected. This is a timely and needed message in our day and age of compartmentalization. Heck, everything is compartmentalized. Children's ministry, youth ministry, young adult ministry, seniors etc... Marketing, same thing. (Not a rant against the church, just showing the compartmentalization in the world).

Lastly, and not at all connected to this post...I am listening to Midnight Rider by the Allman Brothers. Good, good stuff. Ok...maybe it is connected since everything is spiritual. Hmmmm what would Rob say?

Labels: Formation

One common misconception about monastic life is that it is easy. When I would tell folks about my time there they would usually smile and talk about how great it would be to get away and be able to be close with God. They whimsically imagine how peaceful life is in the monastery, and to some degree how wonderful the monks must be.

I have just hinted at about 3 or 4 common misunderstandings but I will address only two of them for now. That is, going to a monastery for an extended amount of time (more than a 1-2 week silent retreat) is not a peaceful get away or vacation with God. I did think this when I entered...boy was I wrong.

You go to battle. What do I mean by this? Many things but I will only mention a few. You face yourself. This alone can be pretty challenging. You begin to see yourself more for who you really are. The saints call this self awareness and it is absolutely essential to life in Christ. It is a primary step in growth in our Lord.

It is a complex subject to be sure but one thing that takes place is you move from looking at your actions to looking at the reasons behind those actions (or the reasons behind those reasons etc...).

You also move from the illusions of certainty to the reality of uncertainty. You simply engage with God as He really is...not what some slick sales pitch wants you to believe! You wrestle with and encounter a mysterious incommunicable God who allows you to go through dry times and one how forms your character at ever deepening levels (as opposed to a God who cares primarily for your comfort).

Enough for now...

Labels: Formation, Monastic

"The fruit of silence is prayer"
-Mother Teresa of Calcutta

"Prayer is the oxygen of the soul...Scripture is food for the soul."
-Padre Pio





Every Friday (pre Vatican II though some still practice this) the Franciscan's would be silent. When they gathered as a community for lunch they would keep silence while having one person stand up and read the Sermon on the Mount while they all ate.

I have used this many times in retreat settings with youth. It is most effective when used after youth have been in silence for a few hours. Why? For a number of reasons...

The ability for you to focus on the reading can be amazing. Not only while you hear it but afterwards too... I think for me it is the realization that the Sermon on the Mount is applicable for today. And that awareness is heightened because you are in the middle of doing Christianity with others. Maybe this makes the Sermon on the Mount seem less impossible or less detached from our everyday experience?

Labels: Formation, Monastic