Interesting Statistical Analysis on Parents and YMin

Our friends at Youth Specialties have recently had their Jr High Youth Pastors Summit. They had Professor Christian Smith come and speak at it (he is the sociology Professor at Notre Dame and the director of the national study of youth and religion. Chris is widely regarded as one of the leading sociologists in the US, particularly in the area chris co-authored, with Melinda Lundquist Denton, the important, research-based book Soul Searching: The Religious and Spiritual Lives of American Teenagers. ). Here are some notes from Marko's Blog (www.ysmarko.com) that are profound:

Christian –
• Started studying teens in 2000, Have kept up with the teens and send cards because they want to be able to conduct more surveys as the same teens age. Last week finished up a third wave survey. Have a retention rate of 78%. In the Fall he is writing a book on the third wave. Not much has changed in the two years between wave one and two, they all were still on the same trajectory. Only two had lives who were significantly different, and they had both had children. They went from way out there to focusing on pulling their life together. Those who have fallen out seem to be those who live transient at risk lives.

• The Role of Parents in Youth Ministry – He went into his work believing that parents must survive their children’s teenage years. He came out of the project realizing how profoundly formed teenagers are by their parents, and other adult figures in their lives. Culture is set up to de-authorize parents from having to deal with their teenage kids. for instance, there are therapists, youth workers, coaches and other specialists who there to fix kids. Parents get the feeling that they are not capable of parenting their own kids, that they aren’t good enough or qualified enough. Many Parents are ok with this. Many Youth Ministers seem to have troubled relationships with the parents of their students. So many institutions are set up to separate teenagers from adult interaction, which is why parents are so crucial, they are the only consistent adult contact that teens have. Teenagers really benefit from just normal relationships with adults. Socialization, students are formed by the things that are around them, and because teens don’t have much control over their surroundings and are therefore shaped by them. Even though teens act as if they don’t hear what their parents are trying to say to them, they are soaking every word up. Teenagers are replicating their parents.

• How do we reach kids without parents who have faith? - The Church has a full time youth ministry, and the kid has friends (majority of friends) who draw them into that youth group. Other adults did not play into these teens faith. This simply stresses the importance of parents and their faith. These are not independent - you need both!

• The most important pastor a teenager will ever have is their parents.

• What really matters with teens are socially relevant relationships ( a sense of belonging)

• Parents need to be part of responsible communities with other adults who challenge them in parenting. Other adults also have a responsibility to try to affect teens and play a role in there lives.

• Styles of Parenting
• Good Parenting has 2 or 3 dimensions. 1st: strong and clear expectations with boundaries, demands and accountablility. (Parents are proactive in educating their children of the paremeters) 2nd: Emotional Warmth and closeness (letting children know they are loved) Both of these must be used together in order to have a well rounded relationship with the kids. The 3rd dimension is Cognitive autonomy, the idea of having space to work things out and room for children to come to a position that is not exactly the same as the parent.

Labels: Formation, Parenting